strange predicaments and situations
by shiirojasmine
Summary: Allen manages to get lost near Konoha in search of Innoncence, and Kanda, while in search of him, ends up being recruited by Kakashi as an ANBU. Meanwhile, Naruto's dead... Yullen Sasunaru
1. Moyashi, Lost Again

He wanted to cry again, and he wanted to cry badly.

He felt weak in the knees and wanted to wrap his arms around him himself, wanting to assure himself that this was all a horrifyingly realistic, stupid nightmare again. It was stupid, since he had never had any reason to feel this way. "…they didn't even give him a funeral." Sakura's voice was quiet, flat but tight with coolly controlled anger. "How could they… one of their own…" Her voice fell to a broken whisper. "…our best friend…"

She forced him to look her in her vibrant, summery green eyes. "Sasuke, don't you miss him, at all?" He said nothing, glancing away from her and Naruto's grave. "Don't look away from me, from him."

"Sasuke…" she said again, a tad softer. "What happened?"

"What going on here?" a light hearted voice said, appearing from behind him. Sasuke turned his face slightly, peering into Kakashi's dark eye.

"A small visit to a dead and worthy man," Sakura answered in her quiet subdued voice. "Maybe we'll ask the others to come by later. As of the moment, will you be joining us?" Kakashi kneeled down, resting his arms on his knees, his thumb and first few fingers brushing dirt gently.

"Knowing him, Naruto wouldn't stay dead for long," he said.

"Don't even joke about that, Sensei," Sakura said, eyes narrowing. "The dead don't walk again. Everyone knows that."

Kakashi simply shook his head.

"You never know."

-----

"Kanda-kun, Ge ge wants you in his office for a bit," Linali said, tapping him on the shoulder.

"If it's not a mission, it has nothing to do with me," he said, turning away from her.

"Hey, don't be like that," she complained, running lightly to catch up to the male. "Anyway, Ge ge didn't specify, but it might be a mission…" Kanda grunted in annoyance, following her into the large room, with Komui nearly completely buried in the mountain of blinding white papers, his head cushioned by the many papers; the coffee, precariously placed close to the edge; and the drool, trickling freely down his chin.

"Just wait a minute, Kanda-kun… Ge ge… I need you to tell me how I look in this really great wedding dress I found." The older man awoke, his screams rebounding in the room.

"Noooooooooo! Not my sweet, precious Linaliiiiiiiiiiiiii!" The screams stopped, replaced by yelps as a leather-booted foot slammed down on his head. Thank goodness.

Komui coughed embarrassedly, regaining his composure "It seems General Allen has once again lost himself."

"Your point?" Kanda said warily, knowing where this was going. Komui was definitely going to send him off to find the damn spineless, naïve general just to spite him. Stupid Chinese man.

"I need you to find him." Bingo. Kanda was so right.

"And if I say no?"

"You have no choice in the matter. Other than Linali, whom I must keep with me," he sniffled, "to help," another sniffle and a tear, "to keep me on task, there are no other exorcists left in the Black Order."

"I thought I saw Rabi-"

"-is very much occupied with Bookman as of the moment. Perhaps later," Komui finished.

Kanda groaned, sighing wearily.

"When do I leave?"

"Preferably as soon as after you pack your bags within the next hour; a little good news, you're going to Japan!" At least Kanda didn't have to struggle through reading English.

"How did Moyashi get lost in _Japan _of all places?" he said, placing his hands on his hips. "This completely confirms, yet again, that he's an idiot." The Chinese man chuckled.

"Tell that to him when you find him." Komui drew out a map from underneath his desk after a few short minutes of search, carefully unwinding the scroll and gently stretched it out. "We believe he was lost somewhere around in this vicinity…" he pointed a finger to a dot, "…of the Hidden Village of the leaves - Konoha. Knowing Allen, he'd go wherever food is…"

"In other words, you mainly want me to search in that village."

Komui nodded. "Basically," he said. "Okay, you may leave now Kanda! Bring him back!"


	2. Kakashi's Proposition

Strange Predicaments and Situations  
Ch2

Naruto was his best friend. There was no doubt about it. He was the one that never gave up on him, the one that had always believed in him, the one that never doubted him, so why had he been so stupid as to not return the favor and help him in the moment that Naruto needed him most?

_I wonder if he's mad at me_, he thought. _I bet he's up there stomping around since he's frustrated_. He smiled a little at the mental image. Indeed, he wouldn't be very surprised if Naruto was screaming at him to stop sulking even from up in heaven. He sighed. _I wish I can go too…_

He could almost feel Naruto bopping him on the head, pointing his finger while shouting at him. _"Get a grip on yourself, teme!"_

There was something very comforting, sitting here, something warm and sunny – like being with Naruto himself, but the grave couldn't replace the laughter, the jokes, the arguments, and the bright smiles shared (mainly on the blonde's part).

Sasuke smiled again, laying a red, fully bloomed rose on the mound.

-----

"Che, how troublesome," Kanda snorted, surrounded by a group of unidentifiable people dressed in black with smirks plastered on their faces.

"Normally, we don't really stop people like you," Kanda scowled, people like him? What was that supposed to mean? "…but even us rogue nin need to have money. So just cough up everything you have, _boy_."

"First off, I don't answer to 'boy', and you are sadly mistaken if you think I'm going to take this." Kanda said, walking past them nonchalantly._What a bunch of weirdo dorks_, he thought.

One ninja side-stepped him, and Kanda scowled, boring his dark, glaring eyes into the man, who was smart enough to flinch. "Where do you think you're going? You haven't paid the toll yet."

"What toll?" Kanda said, glancing up at the band of metal on the man's forehead. "If I'm not mistaken, that's not the mark of Konoha." He refused to believe in any way that he was wrong, having studying the pamphlet earlier today carefully.

The ninja and his man were getting impatient. They couldn't be that elite, to be showing such emotion. He wondered if anyone would miss these idiots if he… took care of them. His hand edged to the hilt of his blade as the ringleader grabbed his collar. "Don't touch me," Kanda growled.

-----

_How interesting_, Kakashi mused, balancing on a thick branch. A single boy was holding out on his own with a group of nin. The boy was definitely highly skilled, and wonderfully trained, even though not in the way of the shinobi. He watched as the boy muttered something under his breath in irritation, ripping off a shred of cloth from the clothes of one of the men he had killed, wiping away the crimson liquid on the shining metal.

Kakashi jumped down, and the boy's head snapped up sharply, glaring at him. "What do you want?" the boy asked crossly.

"Nothing."

The boy stared at Kakashi's forehead. "You're of Konoha," the boy stated.

Kakashi smiled. "Yeah," he answered. "What's it to you kid?" The boy bristled at the ending word, simply narrowing his eyes with distaste.

The boy stood up, brushing dust off his leather pants. "I'm looking for someone."

"Requests for missions are to be sent to the Hokage, not to her shinobi."

"I'm not here for any missions," the boy said exasperated. "I'm looking for someone in particular."

Kakashi nodded. "I suppose I can help with that. On one condition though."

"What?" the boy said annoyed, placing his hands on his hips. Kakashi smirked.

"Let me train you in the ways of our village."


	3. Acquainted

**I'm so sorry that this is like a week and two days late, and I'm even sorrier if this chapter is disappointing in any way, but please accept this, Paybacks a Bitch. Happy Belated Birthday!**

"You want me to what?" Kanda asked, showing no expressions of disbelief, though puzzlement managed to burrow through.

"I want to train you," Kakashi repeated patiently, "as a _shinobi_. Or, I could get someone else to train you, but ut'd be a waste to let you go."

"A _shinobi_," Kanda said. "I have no intention of becoming one." He was already an exorcist; he didn't need anything that would cause unwanted complications in his life. He saw the ninja in front of him shrug, slightly in disappointment.

"I see," Kakashi contemplated for a moment. "I _can_ help you find this person of yours, but… you have to take up a mission first."

Kanda narrowed his eyes. _How troublesome_, he thought. "Whatever," he said. A ninja mission shouldn't take too long, right? He followed the grey-haired man. He'll just get this over as soon as possible and continue gathering information for his search for the stupid bean-sprout.

There was a certain air Kanda sensed as he walked through the village. On the surface, it seemed perfectly normally, almost idyllic, but he supposed that every place had a secret or two, especially a town full on _shinobi_. Why would this town be any different, but it really wasn't his place or job to know things like that.

It was at that moment that there was a crash, a burst of energy, cries of annoyance and horror, and the laughter of an adolescent, and to top it all off – an explosion. "_Narutooooo!" _a man howled a name as a blond skid past them, peals of laughter rolling off him. Kakashi raised an eyebrow before narrowing them, taking a moment to survey the damage. Kanda wished he would hurry up. Was that too much to ask for?

Kanda stood there impatiently, glaring at the older with disapproval, rhythmically tapping his foot on the dirt road as he listened in. "So who was it this time?" Kakashi laughed as he spoke to a pink-haired girl. She huffed.

"I have an idea, but no, it can't be possible." She sighed, a corner of her mouth lifting up. "But if it is, I guess I should've expected this. I mean, this _is _Naruto we're talking about." She turned to him, lifting a pink eyebrow. "I've never you seen you around before," she stated. "Are you a visitor?"

"No," Kanda replied.

"Yes," Kakashi said. "He's accompanying us on a mission." She narrowed her eyes at him.

"We already have Naruto and Sasuke; the three of us will do fine. You of all people should know that."

"I know." He leaned down to whisper, too low for Kanda to hear, no matter how good his hearing was. The girl glanced back at him once in awhile, contemplative.

"He feels… strong," she said carefully, finally. "I can see that, but still…" she sighed, exasperated. "I bet you're doing all of this just to see some live action drama." Kanda did _not _like where this was going, and he was prepared to turn on his heels and march off in the other direction, but a hand reached out and grabbed his collar.

"_Hold _it," Kakashi said. "_You _still have a mission to do."

"Just let him go. I mean, it's pretty obvious he doesn't want to be here," she pointed out. At least _someone _was being sensible here.

"The only reason I was here in the first place," Kanda spat, "was because my _stupid _superior got lost!"

"That still means you have to stay to find him," the girl stated. Scratch that, Kanda didn't like her as much after all. "Well, anyway, we should probably take you to see Hokage-_sama_." Didn't Komui mention something about that or something like that? He couldn't quite remember. At least he wouldn't have to deal with the silver haired idiot for the moment.

The Hokage, as it turned out, was at least half a century old, give or take, from what the strangely pink haired girl informed him, but as he stood in front of the imposing blond woman, he struggled to believe it. Sharp brown eyes scanned him, and he stared back at her nonchalantly, his expression flat and expressionless as usual. "Are you the one the Black Order sent over?" she had asked, leaning forward on her elbows. He gave a curt nod. "I see." The Hokage sent Kakashi a look.

"Kakashi…"

"I'll tell you later, Hokage-_sama_."

Kanda was then promptly shooed out by the pink-haired girl, who gave him a friendly smile. "I'm Haruno Sakura," she introduced, holding out her hand for a shake. Kanda looked at it for a moment before shrugging. 'Spring's cherry blossoms", it made sense, as the girl's hair was so blindingly unnatural.

"Kanda," he said. He didn't give out his first name. The last thing he needed was to be on friendly terms with someone.

"Alright then, Kanda," she said. She frowned, her hand swinging down back at her side, "I met as well take you to meet Sasuke." She thought that the two of them were similar, if not at least in looks, and yet just from the few words exchanged between them - more on her part, but that wasn't the point – that if anything, Kanda would definitely be a very moody person, and she really didn't like having to deal with that.

"I'll go get him," she said, leaving Kanda on the doorstep of the massive Uchiha mansion. She could feel Kanda staring at the house impassively, though his eyes narrowed every once in awhile, almost as if he knew what had happened so many years ago there. She rang the doorbell. It was a very plain sound, but it had a very nice soft echo. The door creaked open, and Sasuke peered out, half in curiosity, and half in knowing.

"The mission, right?" he stated, stepping out. He stared at Kanda for a few moments with inquiring eyes, but said nothing.

"Yeah," Sakura said. "We got another team member too, today. Kakashi insisted." Kanda wanted to object, but decided not to, knowing that it wouldn't get him anywhere. Were all ninja as stubborn as that gray haired guy? Haruno seemed a little bit too talkative, and that Hatake seemed too pushy. So far, Sasuke seemed to be the easiest person to get along with. "Sasuke-_kum_, this is Kanda. Kanda, this is Sasuke Uchiha." Kanda gave a nod of acknowledgement, and Sasuke followed suit, keeping up his silence. Sakura rolled her eyes in exasperation. The mission was bound to be boring with the two of them.

"Now that introductions are over, let's get a move on, shall we," Sakura continued, strutting ahead of the two of them.


	4. On the Road

_Why on earth am I doing this again?_ Kanda grumbled to himself in irritation as he tightened his red tie around his hair. _You better be worth this, Walker._ He really didn't want to be here. He honestly didn't want to do anything non-related to the missions – which definitely included this weird side-mission that the ninjas forced him into. _I ought to sue._

Kanda usually wasn't one to complain unless he was forced to put up with people that annoyed him. A lot. Unfortunately for Sakura and Kakashi, they were forced to face a steaming Kanda and a moodier than usual Sasuke.

"Everybody knows what to do?" Kakashi asked cheerfully.

They nodded and Kanda grudgingly sighed. "How is this going to help me find my general?" he said, gritting his teeth. The grey-haired ninja simply hummed, pulling out an orange book that Kanda later noted was an obscene book that he should avoid. On second thought, Lavi might like something like that and the book might be able to distract the redhead from annoying him every single day.

Dear Kami, he was starting to know too well how Lavi thought. And Linali for that matter. She'd definitely want some kind of souvenir.

Kanda walked slightly slower than the others, eventually falling behind to where Sasuke was. The black-haired man was almost as tall as he was, and Kanda couldn't help but notice that they looked similar - the inky blue hair, the equally dark eyes, the pale skin. It was strange.

Sakura looked past her shoulder and gave a soft laugh. "You guys almost look like brothers, standing next to each other like that." Kanda would've jumped from being startled, but he wasn't what most would call normal any time of day. Sasuke stiffened at the word "brother". Sakura noticed and quickly closed her mouth.

"So Kanda, what's the Black Order like?"

Kanda didn't take a second to think. "The people there are pushy," Lavi, Linali, Komui, Tiedoll, and so many others, "the higher ups don't give a damn about who they're sending to their deaths, and there's this person that everyone really looks up to that's a complete idiotic martyr," Allen Moyashi Walker.

"I take it that this guy is the general you're looking for," Kakashi commented.

"Unfortunately," Kanda said dryly. "We're always being lumped together – I hate it."

"Opposites do tend to attract," Sakura said, glancing at Sasuke with a knowing expression. Sasuke looked away, his lips thinning into a tight frown.

"We're too different," Kanda insisted. "There's no way I'll ever even be _friends _with him." Sakura shrugged before allowing Kanda to catch up to her.

She leaned in close to him, whispering. "Sasuke said that about Naruto too." At Kanda's questioning eyes, she continued. "When they first met, they hated each other – they were bitter rivals. Are you and your general like that?"

Kanda didn't answer. "In the end," Sakura whispered even lower, "they loved each other the most." She laughed softly and pulled back to see the other's reaction.

Kanda scowled, his eyes flashing defiantly. "I _don't_ love Moyashi," he whispered fiercely.

"Moyashi? That's a strange name," Sakura said. Kanda didn't bother to correct the pink-haired medic, focusing his eyes on the road.

"Hey, Kakashi, when will get there?" Sakura called out to him.

"Tomorrow, around noon," the "scarecrow" answered. The sun wasn't as high in the sky as it was when Kanda had just arrived in the village of Konoha. Instead, the fiery orb was almost touching the horizon, and would soon disappear, turning its back on this part of the world for the next several hours. "We should probably make camp soon."

"You'll probably be going to be stuck with gathering firewood," Sakura told him. "Kakashi's lazy, I'm better with setting up the tents, and Sasuke usually feels better hunting." Kanda shrugged. Sakura frowned. He totally was another Sasuke. Boring. She wished she could get more of a reaction out of him. At least Sasuke could look sad sometimes. She bet that "Moyashi" could probably get a rise out of Kanda. After all, Naruto managed to get Sasuke riled up any time he wanted.

"Alright, we're camping here," Kakashi later insisted as soon as the sun was out of the way, the stars were twinkling, and crickets were chirping in the background. "Sasuke, you hunt; Sakura, set up the tents; and you," he nodded at Kanda, "are getting the firewood."

"See, I told you," Sakura said sagely. Kanda rolled his eyes but didn't argue. It was below him to be too rude to females.

"Fine." Each moved to finish whatever they were going to start, and Kanda wandered off into the thick brush of the forest, gingerly walking past, around, and around virgin growth. It was, in other words, annoying.

"Why I ever agreed to this, I'll never know." Why was he complaining to himself? It's not like it was going to solve anything. Kanda gathered some of the thicker, dryer twigs and wood, not really caring where he was heading.

What was the mission supposed to be about, anyway? No one told him anything, yet he was expected to go along with whatever they were planning. He shrugged. If they tried anything, he could always protect himself.

Kanda began to think – not that he didn't usually, he just decided to think a little more than he usually did. He tried to recall something terribly unforgivable that he had done in the past few days that he would receive the bothersome mission of retrieving an annoying person and manage to get _another_ bothersome (and mysterious) mission. He did yell at a couple Finders, thumped the stupid rabbit on the head a couple of times, and… and… the list went on – still, it was nothing _that_ bad.

_I hate you, Kami_.

Kami was bad. Kanda was glad he never really believed in the whole-god-religion-worship thing. It was pointless anyway. What he did believe in, was a thing called, karma. Sometimes.

_It's just my luck that something even worse is going to happen._

Kanda had no idea how right he was.


End file.
